Pressing On

With Allen Bach and Clay O’Brien Cooper

As told to JD Malone

 

“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:14

 

How Strong is your Wheel?

 

Allen:  How would you define a Godly Man?  For me I think it is somebody who lines up every area in their life with God’s word.  As a Godly man you should look to what the word says about being a husband, father, or friend.  As a man we have to be spiritual leaders of our family.  One of the most jerked around scriptures on this subject is Col 3:18-21 “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”  This scripture doesn’t mean that our wives are supposed to bow down to us.  It is telling us that we are head of our household and we are supposed to make the spiritual decisions.  If we read on we will see the way God wants us to treat our wives.  We will also see a guideline for our family structure.  Col. 3: 19-21 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.  20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.  21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”  This scripture tells us how we are supposed to conduct ourselves as godly people.  It is God’s template for us and our families.

 

Clay:  That is so true Allen.  God has a design and a plan for every person as an individual.  But each of us is similar in that we have different aspects or relationships to our lives as individuals.  A lot of us are married and have family and kids.  These are relationships.  We also have other relationships such as parents, relatives, circles of friends, business relationships and acquaintances.  When we fulfill our purpose in the will of God and we walk in the spirit, we fulfill God’s purpose.  Then it is God at work through us in each and every aspect and in each and every relationship in our life. God moves through us to touch people’s lives.  It is really amazing to watch God work in our relationships.

 

Allen:  I look at my relationships like a wagon wheel, with God and my relationship with God being the HUB of the wheel.  When we put Him at the center of that wheel it strengthens every spoke in that wheel!  The spokes are our relationships. One spoke will be your relationship with your wife and another your children, friendship, business relationships, it applies to any relationship we have.  When this happens the wheel roles smoothly and can take the bumps in the road.  As Godly men and women it is important for our relationships to have God at the center of our wheel.

 

Clay:  You see and hear now days about dysfunctional families and kids being raised up in dysfunctional type situations. This is simply another way of saying an ungodly manor.  The benefits of walking with God and walking with God in his word are amazing.  Like James said being a doer of the word of God.  James 1:22 “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”  By walking in the spirit and not your flesh or your mind but doing what the word says, being obedient to God and walking in love, we see God’s hand work in our families and relationships.  Walking in the fruit of the spirit and Giving God 1st place in all of those areas of our lives and our relationships is crucial.  When God becomes 1st place in all of these places in our lives his power and ability come to life and it is such a blessing.  Not only to other people but we get a double blessing back to us because it is a byproduct of being Godly. 

 

 

Allen: I can remember a time when I was carefree.  I just got out of high school I had no wife, no boss; I only had a few responsibilities.  As the chapters of my life started unfolding I had a wife and then children.  Looking back I see how important it is to get and give good Godly training. This kind of training comes from the bible and the examples we set for our children.  Just this morning I was talking with my son.  He had been hearing a lot of things from different people.  I told him ultimately the only people you have to please are your heavenly father and your mother and I.  You know that we are looking out for your best interest and giving you the best advice we possibly can because we are hooked into the lord and receiving wisdom from Him.  That is the most important relationship in your life.  I told him that you shouldn’t worry so much about what other people think about you or what they think you should be doing.  That is why God gives us mothers and fathers.  As parents or as men of God we have to be plugged into God so we can train our kids to be Godly.

 

Clay:  The husband and wife relationship is the core relationship to the family.  When both people can walk in love and walk in a complete oneness then there is nothing that gets in the middle of the core relationship to cause the dysfunction that can spread out to all the other relationships in the family.  The husband is the leader so he has to demonstrate walking in the spirit and by the word of God and in Love.  Because he is the head of the family, he has to be the one to demonstrate walking in a Godly manor in that relationship.  When you see this take place you truly see the beginning of a strong Godly family.  It just branches out to every relationship within that family.

 

Allen: As the man we are to be accountable to Jesus, He is over us.  We are the spiritual leader of our family.  So if it comes down to someone having to make the last call or the person Jesus holds responsible for the family’s spiritual decisions being made, it is the father, then the mother.  This doesn’t mean that the woman has no voice.  If a husband and wife’s relationship is centered around God then the husband will listen to what his wife is telling him.  It is from there that the husband has to make the decision and the wife should support the decision.  The wife, as well as the husband, has the responsibility of teaching and training the kids in Christian principles.  The kids are to respect the mother and be underneath her for her guidance.  When we set our families up to work like this, which is the way God wants us to run our families, we see that everything goes better this way. 

 

Clay: As head of our household we have to lead by example even through tough times.  In my family as situations arise; which happens on a daily basis, I have to demonstrate openly that I use the word of God and that we adhere to the word of God in those situations.  I stand on what the word says and I show that we operate by God’s word.  When we do this it becomes who we are and what we do that is translated to the kids or anyone we have a relationship with.  A lot of times it is not just what we say to do, but what we do that makes the impact.  A child will comprehend what you say but the comprehension is multiplied by many times over when they see you set the example.

 

Allen:  That is exactly right Clay!  For me it seems that all at once 20 years rolled by and now hear I am a father and I have so many different roles in my life.  I think back and see how great it would have been if as a young person I would have started learning the word and being trained as a husband.  So that before I became a husband and a father I would have had an idea on how to deal with family issues and how to be a husband and a good friend.  If we train our children this way early on they will be prepared for their relationships. 

 

Clay:  None of us are perfect as parents, friends, or any other relationship role we play, but it is our commitment when we do fall into error or we realize that we are falling short of the mark that we repent and that we do what the word says 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”  We get up brush ourselves off and we go on.  We never miss a step.  God is right there to keep pouring out the blessings as we keep applying ourselves and dedicating ourselves to Him. 

 

Allen:  Great point Clay.  We have to keep our relationship with God fresh!  That means being a committed Christian and repenting and seeking God out!  Going back to the wagon wheel.  Those spokes can only be as strong as our relationship to God.  The relationships of our lives can only be as good as the relationship we have with God.  It is so important that we keep that relationship fresh.  Like Clay said when we fall short, ask God for forgiveness then get up and go on.  When we renew our minds with God we have better relationship with God and others.  Then we can set those examples and train our children to be Godly!